I took a step away from the bike. It was actually a lot easier than I thought it would be to let it sit there and collect dust. Don’t get me wrong, it felt very very wrong. But sleeping in and having all this “extra” time felt very very good. It was the longest I have been off the bike since, well, my first bike 6 years ago. Sure, I’ve probably taken time off here and there, I’m not always the most consistent but this was different, it was probably weeks (moving states included). To the point I swore I would probably not race again (ha, sure). This is the point where we realize something in life wasn’t going right. Though I wasn’t burnt from training, my coach was actually very good with this, I was burnt out in other aspects and your hobby is usually the first to go when this happens (atleast for me). It’s like crisis management, you shift your priorities to what needs fixing in your life immediately. I was mentally exhausted and it seeped its way into my riding. In my head, if I wasn’t training, there was no point in riding. That is a future post all together.
Well, here I am, trying to get it back and already kicking myself in the ass for taking this time off, though it was probably crucial and much needed. I’m a little fluffier than one would like to be, my watts are at baby levels (yet again) and the thought of racing….well I already feel like a fred. Trying to get consistent has been a challenge, more because I’m in a new city and I have to rely on myself to get out and going. Having that group to meet with, even if we weren’t all riding together, was the best motivator to get me out of bed. But over the last couple of weeks I’ve caught myself looking at the Colorado’s racing schedule. It’s no secret that I also have a 100 mile race in June that I have to get my shit together for. I miss everything about it though…. training, riding atmosphere and racing. It’s a part of me that has been missing. It’s kind of the missing piece in Colorado, along with my friends and family that I’m secretly trying to convince to move. I took this as a sign that it was about that time.
Amateur athletes, age group athletes, sometimes forget that we’re just that, amateurs. This is not our entire life, we are not pros and occasionally it has to take a back burner to adulting and other ridiculous things…like mental health and career. We push ourselves to heaving on the side of the road during an interval before we walk into the 9am meeting and then we don’t stop. Some people can continue this for years without a break, I can admit that I don’t have that kind of strength. Sometimes, you take a step a back, take a break and prepare yourself to come back stronger. With any sport, even curling I’m sure, you need to first mentally be there to prepare yourself physically. So, it was kind of about that time, I got my coach, poor guy is stuck with me and dialing in my nutrition with Jungle Fitness. I am well aware that I am late to start training for the season. I am even more well aware that I am out of shape. Colorado mountains are very humbling. But I also know that I’m ready to put in the work and I couldn’t force this even if I wanted to previously. So I may not be where I need to be but I know that I’m ready to get there, wherever the F that may be. So, here we go, 2018 season. ~AddingMoMiles
AddingMoMiles 